7 Ways To Receive and Be in Flow (Especially if you're a big giver or love to control)

Receiving is a lifestyle that can revolutionize your daily experience at work and home. We delve into the practice of nurturing the heart chakra and what it means to truly open up to love and prosperity. We'll talk about setting boundaries and trusting the ebbs and flows of existence as we learn the art of asking and the joy of letting go of control. Together, these 7 practices promise to enhance not only the way you engage with the world but also the depth and quality of your interpersonal connections.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:01

this is going to be such a good one. There was a woman that is in the woman's group that I'm in, and she posted something yesterday where her before and after picture was astounding. She was glowing, radiant, just like the epitome of a goddess who has the world at her fingers, who is open to receive all the blessings available for her, and she was soaking it all in, and she looked glorious, absolutely stunning. We're going to be diving in in this episode, talking all about opening up to receive. If you are feeling overworked, tired or like things are harder than they need to be, maybe you're even at the point where you're feeling resentful of always having to give so much. This episode is for you. Stay tuned.

Speaker 2: 1:08

You're tuning into the Confident, Connected Leader Podcast, your premier destination for breaking through your current professional barriers. Your coach and host, Lisa Jeffs, will help you transcend limitations and achieve new levels of professional success beyond self-doubt, sabotage and burnout. Welcome to the show.

Speaker 1: 1:32

I've been getting a lot of questions about receiving from both people in my rebirth program, from the women's group that I'm in right now, which is all about pleasure and really allowing ourselves to receive, and it is so important to understand, as women who give a lot, what it means to receive, because when we're off balance, this is where, at minimum, our day-to-day can just simply feel heavier. It's not as joyous, it's not as fun, we can feel like we're kind of these workhorses, and it really does not have to be that way. And the funny thing is, when you can open to receive and you really allow that space to be filled by something other than you just doing and working hard and trying to control, then everything becomes so much easier and you are in the natural flow of the universe. Right, you are in the natural flow. If you are in a place that has seasons, right, the seasons are the natural flow the blooming, the death, the rebirth it just naturally happens. You don't have to work really, really hard at it. You don't have to force it. You don't have the effort. You don't have to work really, really hard at it. You don't have to force it. You don't have the effort, you don't have to make it happen. You don't have to give to the point that you are exhausted, and we're going to dive in in this episode to really help you understand how you can start to open, to receive more.

Speaker 1: 3:44

And really, at the core of this is an identity shift. You must shift your identity into someone who believes they are worthy of receiving, who believes that everything that you are asking for and desiring will happen naturally, and your job is to simply wake up daily and be the person who receives it, and part of this is allowing yourself to receive what your next steps are. So one of the things I help a lot of clients with is clarity and next steps, and if you want to be the person who is simply moving through your life and your work by every day taking actions that are in alignment with your vision, then part of that is being in a place where you can receive the information that contains your next steps, and you must be in a place of receiving to do so. So what this doesn't look like is if you are getting up and you know I remember a time where one of my sabotaging patterns is I can fall into a loop of confusion and this can look like kind of throwing spaghetti at the wall. Is this going to work? Is this going to work? Is this going to work? But not from a curious place, but from almost a panicked place and when I was in that period, going through that period, which was a part of my journey. So if you're in a period like that, understand that it's a part of my journey. So if you're in a period like that, understand that it's a part of your journey. It's not going to be forever as long as you take steps to remedy it.

Speaker 1: 5:53

But I wasn't getting into a place of receiving daily, so I wasn't allowing the information to come to me, which was my next step. I wasn't in the identity of someone who believed that me simply showing up and doing the work I'm here to do and taking aligned action every day and being in a place of receiving was enough for my work and my goals to unfold. Naturally, I believed I had to figure it out and I had to do it all and it was just exhausting and the results were minimal. So we actually want to be in a place of receiving because it's our natural state. It feels great and you will start to notice everything just starts to look better as well and feel better. So how do we get into a state of receiving?

Speaker 1: 6:50

Now, everyone's journey is unique because we all have different beliefs and we didn't all have different the core of. If we're not allowing ourselves to receive fully, then there's some stuff going on that are individual. So you can do this by either journaling and asking yourself the deeper questions on that I can't say no when I want to say no or do I believe that abundance and wealth and fill in the blank comes from me working really hard and comes from sweat equity? Why is that? Where does that come from? Do I remember a parent who used to do that? Was I always validated and congratulated by people who would say oh, you work so hard, we can always count on you, you're so good at X, y, z, and now you feel you can't say no, or now you feel that it's not even an option to just be in a place of resting saying no. I get this image of the goddess on the eating grapes on the eating grapes. So let's talk about it, because there is that individual need to really dive in. You can do that again on your own, or you can do that with a mentor or a coach or someone to help you. This is what I do in my rebirth program and is what I do in my VIP intensives.

Speaker 1: 8:44

But there are some general aspects that you can start integrating in your day that are gonna help you to open, to receive, and the first one is cultivating gratitude. So this is it's. You know, gratitude practices have gained so much popularity over the last five, six, seven years, but a lot of people are they either resist it funny enough or they don't really allow themselves to feel into what the gratitude feels like. I remember the first time I did a gratitude practice and literally my energy just shifted from maybe I was operating from a four this was when I was working within the school board and it went to like I don't know, freaking 300. I remember having a session with an energy reader when I was in this practice, like really diving in, and she said that my energy like the brightnessillsbury dough thing that just expands and he's just like huge and he's walking through the New York and she said my energy was just so big and when your energy is just expanded, when we are expanded, we are in a more conducive place of receiving.

Speaker 1: 10:27

So cultivating gratitude by acknowledging and appreciating what you already have in your life. What do you want more of? Where can you see it already in your life? Gratitude opens the heart right. It transforms our energy. It makes us more receptive to the gifts that the universe wants to offer. You can also show gratitude for what you are asking for. So if you are asking for more time for yourself, then state in the present. I'm so grateful for this time I have for myself. I'm so thankful, thank you. Thank you for this time that I have for myself. You know, whether you you know, if you pray to God or if you talk to the universe, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter who, what, anything, if it's just more of an energetic thing for you. But acknowledging that and getting into that state and really feeling it, feeling the appreciation, is going to put you in to a state of receiving, being in the present moment.

Speaker 1: 11:59

Right when we are taking time to rest, are you in the present moment or are you thinking about all these other things that you have to do? Are you feeling guilty about what you're not doing? Are you actually allowing yourself to rest? Is your brain resting or is it going a million miles a minute, practicing being mindful of your surroundings. Right, being mindful brings us into the present moment. This is the space where receiving occurs. Being fully present right, when we're fully present, we can become aware of opportunities and blessings that are being offered to us that are literally right in front of us. So you can do this by simply paying attention to your senses. What are the colors you see If you're resting, taking a breather, really allowing yourself to enjoy the colors around you? Look at the textures, really feel into what is around you. You know, one of the things that has helped me greatly in my practice and my spiritual practice is really loving the fact that I'm in a human body right now. I came to earth. Earth is the planet of humanness, of human physical bodies. I am enjoying, you know, running my hand up and down a pillow and feeling the sensation of it. Feeling the sensation of it Enjoying. You know, when I drink a glass of water, what it tastes like, how it feels. All these things are going to bring you into the present moment. You know, one of the things my guides always say is enjoy the part of why you came here.

Speaker 1: 14:07

Okay, so, one, really cultivating gratitude. Two, practice being mindful throughout your day. Three is opening your heart space, really opening this energy center right. An open heart is a receptive heart. So many of us have built up walls as a defense of past hurts. However, these barriers block us from receiving love and joy abundance. All these things right Cause us to close down. When we're fearful, we contract. When we're in a contracted state, we're not in a receptive state, we're in a control state. So opening up your heart chakra Now this can be a more in-depth date. So opening up your heart chakra Now, this can be a more in-depth work.

Speaker 1: 15:09

If your heart chakra is closed, there may be some healing. Necessary probably is to be honest. There may be some work in an energetic method. What I want you to do is, you know if, seeing the sun, picturing it in your mind, if you can go outside and it's sunny, great, do this outside. Actually sit somewhere where the sun is beaming down you, either on your back or your front, either on your back or your front and just see this light flowing through your chakra coming from opening in the front, opening in the back, filling up your heart space. Opening up your heart space. Maybe you want to picture something flowing in, something that you love. Maybe it's birds, maybe it's certain things that you like to do. Creative projects, maybe it's kisses from someone you love. Whatever it is, you can get visual, you can get creative with this, it doesn't matter, but it's filling up that heart space and opening it up. There may be, again, some work to be done on releasing any blocks you have of receiving Like. This is where it gets individual. This is where you may want to work with someone to support you. This is may. If you want to talk to me directly, book a breakthrough call. Rebirth is currently in a special pricing until the end of Easter. If that's something that you want to explore and have a conversation with me about, send me a DM. You can email me at info at lisajeffscom.

Speaker 1: 17:07

Number four releasing control. Ooh, this is a hard one. Receiving often requires us to let go of our need for control and trust in the flow of the universe. So one thing that Bashar always says Bashar is a channeled by Daryl Anka, I believe I may have gotten his name wrong, but Bashar often says you know, we don't need to learn how to trust. We always are trusting in something. If we're in a place of lack and limitation or lack of deserving, then that is what we are trusting in. So it's not a matter of learning to trust, it's it's directing where that trust is going.

Speaker 1: 18:00

Are you? Do you feel you always need to be on? Do you feel you can never say no? You know, maybe you aren't trusting the people in your life, or your clients or your team, that they can do a good job without you, and maybe there's good reason from the past. But what do you want to believe now? Because if you continue trying to control and always be in a place where you're resisting controlling, then you're just going to reinforce this pattern. It's just going to be reinforced over and over and over again and ultimately it's based in fear. That's where this is coming from. So we want to release the control.

Speaker 1: 18:53

This can involve surrendering our expectations of how things should look or how things should go or when things should come to us right. We really want to be in a place where we are just elated and surprised and delighted about these wonderful things that the universe can bring us. When we're always in a place of control, then we're not in a place of receiving and we don't get to be surprised and delighted because we're controlling everything and we're limiting the amount that's available to us, we're limiting what can actually flow to us. Again, this is an identity shift. So what do you look like?

Speaker 1: 19:45

As someone who can bask in rest, someone that can have boundaries, that can say no without guilt. Who is this person? Who is this person that just allows things to flow and trust, if you say no, that people will figure out another way and it won't affect your relationship, that they'll honor you saying no, and it actually teaches them how to treat you and what to expect from you. And it actually teaches them how to treat you and what to expect from you. One of the best things I did was instill very firm boundaries within my business, very firm boundaries. It teaches people how to operate around you and it's never had a negative outcome for me at all. It's only positive, only positive. People respect it right. Children love to have boundaries. We often think, you know, some people will think that, oh, it's being cruel or mean. No, it's actually supporting the other people in our life because it's giving them very clear direction.

Speaker 1: 21:14

Okay, so just to recap, we have cultivating gratitude, being mindful throughout your day, opening your heart, releasing resistance and control. Leasing resistance and control. The next one is be willing to ask. Right, asking is a powerful act of receiving. You know, there are people that I talk to sometimes and they'll bring up things with their team or their family or whatnot, or whoever their partner they'll be like. This person never does this, they never do this. And I'll ask them well, have you asked for it? And they say no. Well, how on earth is this person supposed to know what to do? Right, and it's funny when you think about it, it's kind of logical. But when we can get trapped in this loop, either we think that they should know which no, that's a surefire way to be resentful in your relationships or we just don't even realize. It just doesn't flow into our mind. So asking is a powerful act of receiving. Asking the universe, asking your guides. It signals that you are ready and willing to receive.

Speaker 1: 22:46

Now, when you ask, you also have to be in a place of receiving what you're asking for. So let's say that you're asking your partner for something and then they start giving it to you. Are you actually open to receiving what you're asking for? Are you pushing back on it? Do you try to control it? Do you try to dictate how it should look, how it should happen? Do you just not even want it? Does it make you feel uncomfortable when you ask for it? If you're asking for help and then someone starts helping you, do you actually allow them to help? Or do you micromanage? Or do you say you know what? I can do this better myself, even if you can do it better than this other person. Right, even if you can do it better than yourself? This is the tricky part. It's still allowing. Are you in a place of receiving? Are you in a place of receiving, even if this person, let's say, doesn't do it exactly how you want? How can you be in a place of open-hearted gratitude? You can't be the same identity and shift into receiving and be in harmony with giving and receiving. You have to shift your identity. It has to be an identity shift.

Speaker 1: 24:17

So the next one is what does receiving actually feel like for you? Can you cultivate that in your body? What does receiving actually feel like for you? Can you cultivate that in your body? What does receiving feel like? Think about a time where you were just I'll give you an example from my own life On a beach, sun beating down, waves crashing, the smell of the ocean. You know, I order a pina colada and it comes to me on the beach and I have so much gratitude for the people that are working around me and I have so much peace and calm that I don't need to be anywhere else. I don't need to be anywhere else, I don't need to be doing anything else, I don't need to be anything for anyone. I just feel like this open channel, right, absorbing all the wonder that the world has. Can you cultivate that throughout your day, absorbing all the wonder that the world has? Can you cultivate that throughout your day? Can you visualize yourself in a place of receiving, and it could look different.

Speaker 1: 25:58

It doesn't have to look like mine, it can look like anything. Maybe it's you in a state of meditation where you're not trying, you're not trying to figure anything out, you're just in and you're just allowing. You're just sinking into that meditation and allowing what to come, to come. So really understanding what is when I'm in a place of receipt. What does that feel like? What does that feel like?

Speaker 1: 26:35

And the last one is giving without expectation. When you are in a place of giving without expectation, you are fully trusting that and believing in the natural flow. That and believing in the natural flow, so this can look like. If you are, I'm trying to think of a situation where people can get wrapped up, so in some romantic relationships, people can fall into a pattern of transactional right. So transactional can look like you know, I did this, so now you do this, I did this, so you do this, and you're not in a natural flow. Right, can you give without expectation and can you receive without needing to give back, right? Some people have the opposite, where if they receive something, they immediately have to kind of equal the score they got to give back to that person. And when you are in a harmony of giving and receiving, this is going to look like you can give generously, you don't need to receive back anything from that person or that group or whatnot. You know inherently that everything that you put out comes back. This is law, and you can also receive something graciously from someone knowing and understanding that them giving you something and you being open to receiving it is gift enough, and then again they will be is gift enough and then again they will be given something else from whatever is in their flow, and it doesn't need to come from you. You don't need to be in this transactional state right, it can be just this real ease and flow. Ease and flow.

Speaker 1: 28:58

One of the things that people say often, which kind of just internally, makes me like, ooh. One of my love languages is giving gifts, and you know, I know it's almost just a thing people say which is oh, you didn't, you shouldn't have, oh, you didn't have to do this, you shouldn't have, actually closes down, right, the person who is giving it actually constricts that energy. So, if you can really pay attention to how you are receiving, are you receiving something? And you're just like, oh, my God, thank you, thank you so much for this. I love this. This is so thoughtful of you and not having to give back anything, right, you don't feel like you need to give back to the person, and you can if you want, not saying that you can't do that, but it's a different place coming from. Oh, I want to pour into this person, I just feel so good, I just feel so abundant, prosperous and happy.

Speaker 1: 30:09

Then feeling like, oh, now I have to give something to equal the score. Or if you give something to someone and they don't, do you feel somehow slighted? Right, this is showing you that you're not in a harmony of giving, receiving right. Things are very transactional and if this is a belief, then that is going to be your experience in life. You're going to experience a very transactional way of being Okay. So I'm just going to be your experience in life You're going to experience a very transactional way of being Okay. So I'm just going to run down the list one more time for you of going from challenges with receiving to being just an open channel of giving and receiving, flowing just to where you are radiating.

Speaker 1: 30:59

The first one gratitude, cultivating gratitude, really feeling into it. Second mindfulness being present in your day. If you're not present, you are blocking your ability to receive right. All receiving happens in the present. Opening your heart what healing needs to happen? What work do we need to do to open your heart? Where you feel safe in your body, where you feel safe and comfortable to open it?

Speaker 1: 31:33

Four releasing resistance and control. To all my control freaks, this is really really important, right? How can you get into the flow? How can you direct your trust towards the natural flow of giving and receiving, that everything works out for your highest good? You don't need to control it. Five being willing to ask. Ask for your highest good. You don't need to control it. Five being willing to ask. Ask for what you want. Are you asking for what you want daily, whether that's your spirit team or to the people in your life? If not, how can you be open to receive if you're not asking?

Speaker 1: 32:14

Six cultivate the feeling of receiving. What does receiving feel like for you? You have to understand what it feels like when you're in a feeling of receiving. What does receiving feel like for you? You have to understand what it feels like when you're in a place of receiving. Seven give without expectation, receive without needing to give back to that.

Speaker 1: 32:34

When you are in a flow of giving and receiving everything, it works itself out. You do not need to be the person to make sure everything is on equal planes, because there really is no equal planes. In that way of looking at it, it just becomes this weird transactional kind of experience and that completely takes away from the wonder and delight and just this incredible way of being in this world. You know when you can really tap in to your own energetic fields and feel into. You know if you think about a tap and the tap is just flowing out. You know you put it on blast and it's just flowing.

Speaker 1: 33:28

Is your tap flowing out? Is your energetic tap flowing out, your energetic receiving tap, or is it a little bit, you know, midway? Or is it kind of just dribbling out? Or is it not going at all? Is it completely off? This is your way of intuitively tuning into what do I need? What do I need more of? How can I get into this absolute flow and expectation and trust that I can honor my needs first, that I can give to myself and when I give to myself and I set boundaries, that I'm actually allowing myself to receive so much more and, in turn of me receiving so much more, I can actually give so much more. Right, we can't give when our tap is just dribbling out, and this is, you know, the challenge for so many of us, leaders and light warriors and givers that we can fall into this trap. Okay, so I hope this was helpful.

Speaker 1: 34:36

If you need support in this, of course, reach out. If you want me to go more in depth on anything, send me a DM. I would love to hear from you directly. Your questions help me create podcasts that you actually want that give you the value that you need. And if you wanna chat with me about Rebirth, it's my six-week program. We're gonna be working really in depth over those six weeks. It's my six-week program. We're going to be working really in-depth over those six weeks. It's completely tailored to you, but I can give you a breakdown. If you want to talk more with me the special pricing ends at the end of Easter Would love to support you if it's a good fit. Other than that, I'm so honored if you're still listening. I appreciate you and let's stay connected.

Speaker 2: 35:23

Thank you for tuning into the Confident, Connected Leader podcast. Lisa Jeffs is committed to helping you break through barriers and climb to new professional heights. If today's episode inspired you, we'd be honored if you could subscribe, rate and leave a review To stay updated with practical tips and insights, follow us on LinkedIn, Instagram or Facebook. You'll find all relevant links, including those for our complimentary gifts and trainings, in the show notes. Until our next episode, embrace your confidence and stay connected.